3 Steps to over coming the fear of visibility

The fear of visibility is something that many of us know all too well. It held me back for years, keeping me in the shadows, allowing me the comfort of staying small and hidden.

If you are not where you want to be in your relationships, life or in your business then you too may be afraid of stepping up and being seen.

There are many things that can hold us back, vulnerability, guilt, inadequacies, comparing, overwhelm, for me it was the primal fear of safety.

You see for years I had been hiding, I was in a bad relationship in my early twenties and when I tried to take my son and leave, it all went bad fast. Both my son and I almost died. It was extremely traumatic. We moved away and I became that over protective mother. Wanting to work but never wanting to leave my children either. I had nightmares for years and it took me a long time to get onto social media. Afraid he would find us again, afraid of what could happen.

But then came the worse moment of my life… and I ended up with a sever back injury that laid me up in bed for months, I had no way of protecting anyone I couldn’t even get my own body up to go to the bathroom, I had to be carried.

It was during this time that I realized I was no longer going to live in fear of anything or anyone. I didn’t want my boys to have to face the same struggles that I had. I didn’t want them to have to take care of me like they were doing. I was going to make sure that they were safe and taken care of even if I couldn’t do it. I was going to have to become financially free, even if it meant doing it from my bed.

Here are the 3 simple steps I used to switch the switch so to speak and go from fear and shadows to light and visibility. I hope that they help you, as much as they helped me.

#1 – Heart and Soul Clarity

There has to be something that you want more, than you don’t want. Does this make sense to you?
In other words your “want” has to be so motivating that it will keep you moving towards your goals no matter what challenges come up for you to face. Plus you have to want it will all your heart and soul. You must feel it in every fiber of your body. It will become the fuel that fires you up, so that you don’t stop believing in yourself or the movement you’ve decided to create.
You must get a crystal clear focus and superb clarity on your want.
Also, this is a big point… when you think of having your want, It must make you feel love, joy, excitement and gratitude for having and/or achieving it. These are the feelings that will help you to move forward and take action on being more visible, so that you can achieve your goals

#2 – Change your story

When something bad happens in my life. I change the story.
No, I don’t tell myself fairy tales. I tell myself about the good that has come from the horror.
Most of the time when something bad happens to us, we play that horror over and over again in our minds filling the mind with all sorts of terrible details that would be better off forgotten.

For example; The way I shifted my energy and mindset around my son and I almost dying at the hands of my ex-fiancee. Was to keep telling myself, I have full custody of my son because of what happened. I’m so happy I do not have to share custody rights with that man. This is what I said to my self over and over again. I sent so much gratitude and love to having full custody and I stood in that power, whenever I felt weak or overwhelmed about being in front of a camera or going onto social media.

#3 – Move outside of yourself

Think and focus on the person or people you can help. Allow their energy to move you forward.
If you make the love of helping another person your focus rather than taking on the personal fear of being seen or heard, its 10X easier to do what you need to do.
I mean think about it… It’s so much easier for us to schedule in our child’s hockey or soccer games and practices 3 or 4 times a week than it is for us to drag ourselves to the gym even once a week.
So, try committing to your audience once a week with this much vigour, you will be amazed at what can and will happen. You will start to feel so much more excitement and joy around being visible, rather than fear, overwhelm and procrastination.

Bonus tip.

You may have heard it said that Content is king, But did you know that Consistency is Queen?
You need to be the hero (or Queen) of your own life. Stop looking for someone else to recuse you. Create the life you want through small and consistent steps. Not only will this get you to where you want to go, but it will also “create you” you will become the person you want and need to be through these new habits. You will become the Queen of your own life, a Visible queen who loves to be seen for who she really is.